Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize . . . it was your money to start with.
Reintarnation: Coming back to life as an Arky.
Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people, which stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
Cashtration: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who does not get it.
Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
Osteopornosis: A degenarate disease
Karmageddon: Its like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it is like a serious bummer.
Decafalon: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
Glibido: All talk and no action.
Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
Arachnoleptic Fit: The frantic dance performed just after you have accidentally walked through a spider web.
Beelzebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into our bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
Caterpallor: the color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you are eating.
Ignoranus: A person who is both stupid and an asshole.
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